Dreams of days past
So sweet, so real.
In them, my heart gently swims.

If only I could go back…

Best time of my life,
I say with a smile and a sigh.
Best time of my life,
Though it pains me to acknowledge it.

But, oh, I have great hopes still of a good and happy life.
It can never be what it was, but it can be good.
And so I go on in search of my good, second-best life.

But as I move forward in this noble quest,
I find myself somehow bound and restricted.

Little did I know that the sweetness of my past
Would create a prison in my future,
Carefully crafted, made just for me.

Experiences that once set me free
And made me soar to heights I’d never imagined,
Have now, in a cruel twist of fate, become my chains.

Who could create such an elaborate
And beautifully complicated penitentiary?

Could it be me?
Has the prisoner been the captor all this time?

I didn’t even know I was behind bars.
I had spent years limping under the weight of that yesteryear longing,
And I didn’t even know it.

But you did.
You knew.
And you waited.

You stood by and loved me all the while,
As I struggled to break free from the prison I created.

You gave me the space to breathe it in,
To own it and experience it on my own terms.
In your wisdom, you let it run its course.
Somehow you knew healing would come in time.

And your knowledge and your wisdom became my saving grace.
What you knew, I came to believe.
And what I believed became true.
Because of you.

My freedom came,
Because of you.

November 2013